A Funny Birthday Card

Ok, so my loving cousin got me the following birthday card:

A Birthday Fairy Tale
Once upon a time, there was a princess who was like a size four or something. She could eat and drink whatever she wanted and always stayed really skinny and had flat, firm abs even though she never went to the gym. Every time she tried on jeans, the very first pair fit perfectly and made her butt look amazing. She lived in a great big, beautiful castle with her handsome, multimillionaire husband, who was busy all the time buying her giant diamonds, taking her to Hawaii, giving her foot massages, and telling her how beautiful she was. One day, she was eaten by a dragon and no one cared. The End.

I think that this is the funniest card I have ever received! I love it! Thanks Lesha.